The Intruder Had Gratitude & Wide-Eyed Wonder

Em discusses her latest read - The Intruder by Frieda McFadden, as well as her new beach read and finding the beauty in life.

Transcript

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Hey book lovers. We are back again. I can't tell you how immensely happy I am to be podcasting and really focusing on writing again. This past year took a lot out of me. Messy or amicable divorce is rough, especially trying to make sense of a 24-year relationship. That is a very long time to be with somebody who doesn't necessarily like you. Not that it's entirely his fault either. I have never had a chance to know who I am, and I tried really hard to be what he wanted, and what I thought was expected of me. And I did it really, really well. Until I didn't. And once you can't, you just can't anymore. Anyway, the last year was spent focusing on survival and grieving. And honestly, it needed to be that way. But eventually I sat down to write. And I thought about how I was finally feeling like myself again. The only part of me that I really wanted to hold on to from before is still there. I don't know if there's a way to describe how it feels to come back to life after so long just existing and just feeling numb or feeling nothing. I'm definitely still learning to work through all the darkness and to silence the ever-present, insistent negative voices that have been a nuisance my entire life. And one thing that definitely silences the negative voices is writing. It always has been. It's my greatest strength. And I've always known that. Which, considering how little confidence I have in most areas of my life, especially when I was younger, that is saying something. But once the words go on the page, life just seems less terrifying and manageable, maybe. Or at the very least, I can escape for a while, you know? Right now I am finishing up my short story collection, What She Left Behind. The title has changed quite a few times, and I finally settled on just using the title of one of the stories in the book. And I'm really pleased with it. If you watch shows like Wives with Knives or Who the Bleep Did I Marry, you know, fun stuff like that. I think you'll really enjoy this collection of stories. And these were lifesavers for me. I started them before divorce was a discussion. And it was in a very, very dark, difficult time in my life. Potentially the darkest and most difficult time of my life, actually. And writing was the only thing that kept me rooted during some of those like really dark times. The stories have evolved a lot since then. That's one thing I love is seeing the way a story changes over time and through a series of revisions and new revelations. And like I said, I'm very happy with these. I was surprised to find that three of the five are actually more of a novella length. So it's a really good length book. I'd say it'd be like an ideal summer beach read if you're looking for something. And it's going to be coming out very soon, so it'll definitely be out in time for you to hit the beach and enjoy. I'm really excited to share it with you all, uh, so keep an eye out, and I'll let you know when it comes out. So speaking of books, this week's is an excellent one from Freda McFadden. I want to talk about The Intruder. So I have been on a real Freed McFadden kick lately. I read one of her books, and I just kind of went on a bit of a binge. And I'll cover most of them soon enough. But this was the one that I just barely finished, and it was excellent. I have really enjoyed all of them. She writes my kind of book. I love a good psychological thriller, and she does it really well. And recently I saw an article claiming that she used AI to write her books, and it made her so angry that she actually ended up revealing her real name, which is Sarah Cohen. She was a physician before she started this incredible writing career. This woman has published like 30 books, and she started out self-publishing, which I think is awesome because she just wanted to hold a book of her own, and I totally get that feeling. And self-published or not, it is the best feeling. I can't wait for this next one. But yeah, so she refuted that she uses AI, and she was rightfully pissed about it. She's around my age, and it's definitely more likely that she understands the English language really well, and less likely that she would be using AI. Like, come on now. We're 45. Her books are fantastic. Like I said, I've read a bunch of them. She's really masterful at weaving timelines together and adding in unexpected twists and turns. She has gotten me good a few times, and like that is exciting for me. I'm always trying to guess the twists in books, movies, whatever. And I like to pick things apart, so I'm pretty good at figuring them out. And she has really gotten me, and I appreciate that. This one was a little different than most of them. It bounces back and forth between two timelines, now and before. Now is focused on Casey, a former teacher in her mid to late 30s, who has lost her job and now lives in a cheap cabin in the middle of nowhere in New Hampshire. She's got a creep landlord who hits on her constantly, and a male neighbor who is not too far away, and insists on stopping by, and he acts a little too familiar with her. You know how it is, ladies. So Casey is preparing to ride out a pretty bad thunderstorm that's coming, and she's worried about the aging roof of the cabin when she sees something in her backyard. It's brief and out of the corner of her eye, so she can't be certain that she's seen anything. So she continues on preparing. But a little later she sees a light in the shed behind the cabin. And this time there is no doubt. The power is out at the cabin, and this light is the only thing penetrating the otherwise complete darkness. Casey braves the storm to go investigate. She's got a gun and honestly very little fear. And what she finds is surprising, to say the least. There is a girl in the shed. She's small and very thin, maybe 12 years old, and she is terrified. She's soaked through and clutching a knife. And when Casey finally convinces her to come inside the cabin where it's dry and somewhat safer, the girl stands up and reveals that her clothes are covered in blood. Alternating with this timeline is the before timeline, focused on Ella, a young girl growing up with her hoarder mother. And this was masterfully done. McFadden paints a fetid picture of a life amongst the trash and obsession of her terrible mother. This woman is truly cruel. And one of the punishments that she does to Ella is so harrowing and so upsetting, I was not prepared. It is rare that a book upsets me and this one. That got me. It really got me. So, on top of living in the trash house, Ella can't wash her clothes anymore. She doesn't have money for school lunch, let alone being able to use the laundromat. So she smells a little bit, and middle school kids are ruthless. Her whole life is hell, and there's not much that she can do about it. She does gain a friend, and it greatly improves her life. And not just because he starts bringing extra sandwiches for her, but because she actually has someone to talk to who seems to understand her. But life for Ella is unendingly unfair, and her friend is soon ripped away from her, and her life really begins to unravel from there. So back with Casey in the now, the bloody girl in her shed is named Eleanor, and she has learned little else. The girl is sullen and secretive, but she does accept the food that Casey provides. The former teacher in her sees the telltale signs of abuse, and she wants to help this girl more than ever. But when Casey gets too curious and pries a little too much, things take a turn, and suddenly Eleanor is a completely different child. A dangerous one. This book is a wonderful exploration of family and abuse and love and betrayal. And it was so different than what I expected. I loved it from page one to the very last line. Absolutely incredible. I will say that I guessed the twists in this one early on, but it didn't take away from the story at all. It unfolded a little differently than I expected, and the end was excellent. This is a really good read. It's quick, it's fun, it's heartbreaking at times, and it kept me on the edge of my seat until the very end. I definitely recommend The Intruder by Frieda McFadden. You will not be disappointed. Not like Ella was. So now it is time for the quote of the week. I debated cutting this section with the return of the podcast, but honestly, I'm a word nerd and I love a good quote. And I really don't think I'm alone in this. So I've decided to keep it, and here's this week's quote. There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle, the other is as though everything is a miracle. This quote was attributed to Einstein on the Goodreads page, but these days who knows where these things come from. Let's just go with it. I spent a very long time looking down and not seeing the magic of life, and making the choice to look up and realize how incredible life is has changed absolutely everything for me. So this quote really struck a chord with me. Now I try to go about life with the idea of gratitude and wide-eyed wonder. I may always be called naive, and I am, I know that. But I think I'm okay with that. I get to see the beauty of this world and the magic that is all around us. And I'm grateful to have done the work that has gotten me to this point. I used to only be able to see the darkness, the sad stuff, the hopeless stuff. But everything really is a miracle. And I'm really glad that I'm here to see it all. And I am grateful for another chance to chat about books with you all. Thank you so much for sticking with me, book lovers. We're back and better than ever. I hope you have a beautiful week, and of course, keep reading.